Daughter of The Smartest Human Alive

By: dad On: Feb 05 At: 9:53 am | Discussion (0)

couch baby stand
I have invented a new baby device. You have a buy a couch with cushions. The heavier the cushions the better. Also a big lounge chair would work as well.
baby couch
All you do, is stuff your baby down behind the cushion, so they are wedged between the couch back-frame and the cushion. The reason a heavier cushion works better is so the baby cannot move. You can also shore up the cushion with 1 or 2 of the 30 excessive throw pillows your wife has piled the couch under. The beauty of this setup is that you can stuff your baby in, and walk away without fear of baby doom. Of course out of sight is a bad idea, unless its only for a few hours… just kidding. But anyway, you can then play your video games, or just wander aimlessly around the house, and baby is safe.

The side effects are, puke on the couch, drool on the couch, snot on the couch, and wife being mad at you when you get caught.

The benefits are, being able to change a light fixture, play video games, cook some food, baby loves it since she can watch you do stuff, wife thinks its cute even though you are being a bad daddy.

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